It is amazing to think that the God who knows all of me
even more intimately than I know myself
still loves me enough to pursue me each and every day.
You know when you have one of those thoughts that just jumps into your head, and you're kind of overwhelmed by it? That's pretty much what the thought above was. It's one of those things that if you grew up in church you've heard over and over. The idea that God loves and pursues us is one of those things that they say at church a lot. It's a whole different ballgame though after it sinks in and becomes really real to you.
Let me give you a little more information so you kind of know where this came from for me. I have a tendency to use the notes section on my phone to record so many different things. I will type out random, funny thoughts or reminders. I also use it when inspiration hits, or there is a really deep thought that I want to go back to later on. The latter is exactly what this was. It came to me as I spent time with someone who at one point in my life (like 20 years ago) I thought I was going to marry. That's a whole different blog though, let's get back to the main thing. The thought I quickly recorded in my phone is in itself overwhelming, humbling, and just downright awe-inspiring to me. When I went back to the thought later on though, is when it really came alive.
If most of us are honest with ourselves we will freely admit that we truly desire to love and be loved. I'm definitely in that category of people. As a divorced, single mom there is a part of me that wonders if I am ever going to find that "knight in shining armor". I try to avoid the pitfalls of jumping into that whole "this guy is THE ONE" mindset. It's tough sometimes to accept the reality that while God has a plan for me, the guys I meet and/or date have just as much of a free will as I do. At the end of the day it comes down to the choices we each make every day. It's a realization that God may direct certain things, but we all have the choice of whether or not we want to stay and live in His will. That's a hard thing to realize and own. It gets really hard when you are face to face with that person that you think really could be "THE ONE" that you want to spend the rest of your life with.
This is the moment when God stepped in to remind me that HE is my ONLY ONE. Please listen to my heart, God is and always will be the only one we need. Of course that doesn't mean that your marriage isn't/wasn't blessed and possibly even ordained by God. I am thrilled for you if you have that! For those who don't though, I truly hope you find comfort in what I am about to say. Knowing that God is your One means that if your partner (or the person you expected to be your partner) chooses to step out of God's will (or to never even step into it) that you are no less loved and pursued by the true Lover of Your Soul. It also means that there are lots of other people in the same boat, and that means that God may be preparing and planning to direct your paths together with someone who is dealing with the same kind of situation. Just take that in for a moment...
I don't know about you, but that almost makes me want to shout. That is beyond freeing to a single woman (or man) that struggles with wondering if there is something wrong with them or if they are good enough. I can answer both of those questions easily... yes and YES! Yep, you read that right...something is wrong with you. It's the same thing that's wrong with all of us...sin. We are selfish and broken and needy and scattered and just flat out human. That means it's even more amazing to realize that the God who knows all of you still loves you and pursues you. You are and always have been good enough for His love and forgiveness. So rest in that, dear child of God. Whether you are single, divorced, happily married, unhappily married or whatever category you want to throw yourself in...God loves you beyond compare. He pursues you. He longs to be close to you. He is so much more than a partner could ever be. He is the King of kings and the Lord of lords, and He loves you more than you could ever know. He will always be enough.
"But God put his love on the line for us
by offering his Son in sacrificial death
while we were of no use whatever to him."
~ Romans 5:8 (MSG)~
